Tuesday, August 31, 2010

What I Know To Be True #11

Whatever lefties are squealin', squalin' or yappin' loudly about, you can be assured it's something they can't control, something that threatens their very libbie ways, their lies, their manipulations, and what hurts them the most, their thieving ways.  In their desperation to continue to take what they desire from you, they laser focus their destruction on whatever, whomever, gets in their way.

I give you a smattering of examples to cement my case.

Behold!

The left hates Glenn Beck (IE can't control him and can't contain his appeal against the left):

1) Huffington Post Offers $100,000 for Sex Tapes, Phone Records to Destroy Glenn Beck

2) Ben Jealous (!) is saying without saying the Glenn Beck rally is full of RACISTS.

3) Rev. Fauntroy compares Tea Party (and Glenn's rally) to the KKK.

As I said, a mere smattering and it's as vile as they accuse conservatives of being.

The left hates Sarah Palin:

1) In a poll conducted by Vanity Fair (lefties) and CBS News' 60 Minutes (lefties) majority says Palin not qualified to be president  LOL!  After I stopped laughing from considering the source of the polling, I then wondered "not qualified as compared to what or whom?"

2) Jon Avlon over at The Daily Beast asserts Palin and Beck are dividers and sully MLK's vision.  That he swipes the time to suit up line from Barney on "How I met Your Mother" is laughable.  Wonder if he knows Barney is fictional...kinda like the tales libbies tell.

3) The Democratic National Committee (big dawg) and the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee (big dawg) are both chasing Palin.  The no likey her.  Not even a smidge.


When the left hollers about racist conservatism or KKK ralliers, pay close attention.  While the nonsense coming out of their mouths is dramatic and full of anger meant to inflame listeners, it's what they aren't saying that's way more telling.  What they are expressing to you via their actions is more accurate than any words they speak.  They are telling you that they fear their freebie meal-ticket (you) is in jeopardy of being stolen.  They are telling you who scares the beegeebers out of them (almost always it is someone claiming freedom from government intrusion and control).  But most importantly, they are pointing out the good guys.

And oh how they hate the good guys. HATE THEM!

65 more days.

Hang tough, mah babies.

Monday, August 30, 2010

More Proof That Conservatives Walk The Walk

Let me make this easy for everyone.  An important core difference between Conservatives vs Libbies can be simply illustrated by the following.

Libbies:





Conservatives:




Any questions?

Friday, August 27, 2010

Friday Film!

Made Me LOL of the Day: Giving Obama credit where credit is due.



I'm sorry, race to the WHAT WHAT?! And Barry is responsible?!

Well, that's disturbing and an obvious WIN!

You're welcome, peepers. Consider this gem your weekend kick-off.

RACE TO THE C*CK! (check your local listings for start times)

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The Shameless Truth

Yesterday, I talked myself down from the "I Am So Gonna Punch Someone In The Nuts" ledge.  I told myself, "Self, you need to calm your ass down.  Insanity out of Washington, by Washington, is to be expected.  It's the norm, not the exception."  It's like being on the summer reality show of Big Brother.  "Expect the Unexpected." 

But today, I decided I'm gonna climb right back up there and not come down until someone TAKES THEIR LICKS!

If we needed only one reason, laughable at the very least, to get the status quo out of Washington, this would be it: Even those who happily take credit for writing horrible bills profess not to read them, YET pass them into law anyway.

I give you Democrat Senator Max Baucus as a prime example that you should hold close to your heart when you arrive at the polls in November.

At a public meeting in Libby, Montana, a community hit hard by asbestos poisoning, Judy Matott asked this question:  “...if either of you read the health care bill before it was passed and if not, that is the most despicable, irresponsible thing.” 

Go Judy!


Baucus replied, " Blahblahblah..." and then this condescending horseshit, “I don’t think you want me to waste my time to read every page of the health care bill. You know why? It’s statutory language,” Baucus said. “We hire experts.” 

BOOM!

There it is; the truth.  Blink and you might miss it.

The truth is Washington decides your burden without even understanding/knowing/caring what they are voting into law because THEY HAVEN'T READ IT and secondarily, it won't affect them, so why go through the hassle of all those words.  But no worries, they hire "experts" to handle the troublesome reading part.

Enraged?!

Good.

Now, spread the news.  Cause just like the summer hit Big Brother, we get to vote the idiots out.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Couric, Stallone and Your Congressman

Need one more reason to dislike Katie Couric?  Yeah, didn't think so.  But, I got one anyway.

Go HERE and watch the short video.

In part she says:

"There is a debate to be had about the sensitivity of building this center so close to Ground Zero. But we can not let fear and rage tear down the towers of our core American values."

Way to go Kati, looks like you got the burka pulled over your eyes.  Is it any coincidence that your ratings, as reported HERE, have tied your all time low?  You may be naive or just plain ignorant/stupid when it comes to what is actually happening, but the majority of Americans, not so much.

Say goodnight, Katie.


Need one more reason to love Sylvester Stallone?  Yeah, didn't think so.  But, I got one anyway.

Go HERE and watch the video.

In part he says:

"America apologizes too much."

SMOOCH



Finally, a funny to counteract all the mosque-blech that's going around:

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Wishing Punching People In The Mouth/Nuts Wasn't Against The Law

Be forewarned, I'm in a punching mood. Someone needs to take their licks.

Imam Thanks Obama.

My fist is curling into a ball as I continue to read about the Imam's disgusting and evil use of the words "religious tolerance" as he takes a dump on what most Americans consider to be holy burial grounds at Ground Zero. All I can think of when I read about this mosque and their so called "tolerance" is: what a lying sack of shitholes these people are, Muslim or not.

I'm Catholic, and you can believe me when I tell you that I loudly and frequently condemned the Pope and all others in leadership positions for not taking swift and decisive action during the pedophilia trials. How dare they not stand up for what is right and just. I held them complicit of sweeping evil under the rug. How dare they.

That being said, how dare Muslims, or more precisely, radical Muslims including the Imam and Daisy Mae, think that what they are doing, forcing themselves on the grieving and wounded, forcing their "religious tolerance" upon a scar that isn't close to healing, that quite frankly will never be forgotten, forcing their viewpoint to be held above all others, how dare they think they are right, how dare they accuse us of intolerance, when it's their very intolerance of decent humanity that is causing the growing and just strife.

Must. Punch. Someone.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Monday Madness

Is it wrong that I'm already getting a little giddy and light-headed?!



SNAP OUT OF IT! MAN THE BATTLE STATIONS! NO CELEBRATING UNTIL THE VOTES ARE IN!

I only scream because I heard Biden regurgitated this out of his blowhole at a meeting of the Democratic National Committee:

"The Republican Party is out of step with where the American people are...."

Who else is stunned?! He's bullshitting his very own people. WOW. If he'll say this to them, it just goes to show the length to which they will lie to the American voters to keep whats they gots come November.

SO, ON YOUR TOES PEOPLE!

Whew, this is exhausting....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


New in-vogue word of the week that gives me the BLECH: Islamophobia

The Ground Zero mosque planner is now telling us that our resistance, our unenlightened opposition, to the mosque on Ground Zero is equivalent to the persecution of the Jews.

Hey Daisy and Imam, way to make peace, way to calm troubled waters by attempting a parallel that is anything but. This is nothing like the persecution of the Jews. Last I recall, Jews didn't fly our own planes, into our own buildings, killing our own. Jews haven't declared a jihad against our country, against our very way of life. And yes, I am aware Muslims died on 9-11, but they aren't you and your Cordoba Initiative, they aren't you and your sketchy funding with monies possibly coming from terrorist groups that aim to harm us, and they aren't you and your piled on pain and a big f-u after the fact, now are they?

Get it right, Daisy Mae. I don't have Islamophobia, far from it.

I have Imamophobia.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Interactiveness and FRIDAY FILM!

There's a great interactive graphic over at The Washington Post that shows how the fight over the tax credits affects your bottom line.

Click HERE and give it a whirl (hat tip: grumpy old man). Might wanna put your helmet on first though. Gonna cause some head bangin' fo sho.


On to our Friday Film: Extreme



Boom! Boom! and Boom! The first BOOM! is for the dead on bulls-eye of this message. The second Boom! is because this particular video points out that November 2nd happens to be my birthday (without being too showy) and the third BOOM! alludes to the present you all are gonna be gift-wrapping for me.

TO THE POLLS! (and happy birfday to me!)

Thursday, August 19, 2010

If You Pay Attention, People Show You Who They Are

Maybe it's because I had a loved one in Manhattan on 9/11, maybe it's because I am a the daughter of a strong-minded immigrant (now a naturalized citizen) who lived through WWII, maybe it's because I'm a Texan and have never backed down from a righteous fight, maybe it's because I love this country and give thanks every day for my freedom of speech, or maybe it's because the dead of 9/11 no longer have a voice, but this I know to be my truth: I will never forget.

Never.




The Ground Zero mosque has every legal right to be built on private property, but it's not the right thing to do. How can they possibly reconcile their hope to build trust with those of different faiths, to reconcile their supposed prayers of tolerance and understanding, when their combative actions are to dismiss the pain and pleadings of the majority of Americans to build elsewhere?

The programs at Cordoba Initiative (CI) are designed to cultivate multi-cultural and multi-faith understanding across minds and borders.

Arrogance, disrespect, and disdain are not the fruits of love or peace. They are not who they say they are: they are their actions. Never forget that, either.

Never.

And how about this little known story at Ground Zero (hat tip: lawhawk): Desision not to rebuild church destroyed on 9/11 surprises Greek Orthodox leaders

"Though talks between the church and the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey stalled last year, church leaders say they've been trying to kick-start discussions ever since. But amid debate over whether a proposed Islamic community center should go forward near Ground Zero, government officials threw cold water on the prospect of any deal with the church -- telling Fox News the deal is off the table. "

Anyone else having trouble with the juxtaposition of these two stories?

9/11 will be a scar I carry for the rest of my life, like the scar of WWII that my mother carries. It's just not possible that I could forget that day, or where I was, or how I felt, or who was responsible.

I'll never forget and I'll never stop fighting against those who wish to harm us. Even if that means Nancy Pelosi and her investigative thugs come knocking.

Never.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Douche of the Day (BONUS EDIT!)

Douche of the Day: Justice Department

The Justice Department is messin' with my man Joe again. You know how I feel about that.

Justice Dept. Threatens to Sue Ariz. Sheriff Arpaio in Civil Rights Inquiry

They are "investigating" if Joe discriminates against Hispanics. ~sigh~ Hey Justice Department, I bet I can save you all kinds of time and (my) coin here. Listen carefully: Joe doesn't discriminate against Hispanics; he's looking for ILLEGALS. He's doing the job the federal government said they would do (by the current laws on the books), but refuses to do. So stop lying and start calling this "investigation" what it really is, a sham, a smoke screen, a witch-hunt. We know it and you know it.

WAIT A MINUTE!!! This just in. There seems to be a TIE for Douche of the Day! A first, ladies and gentleman.

Douche of the Day: Nora O'Donnell

Nora says that those who oppose the Ground Zero mosque are, and I quote, "like the people who attacked America and killed 3,000 people."

No really, she said it.



Nora may actually be a Douche of the highest order, the Grand Poohbah of Douches, if I may.

Not to mention that she is insulting the majority of Americans by likening them to terrorists. Douche 101: she's doing it right!

Blech.


BONUS EDIT: MADE ME LOL of the DAY!!!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Kick Ass Tuesday!

Meet Ben Quayle:



Ben is stealing my shtick!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Nail meet RUSH DA' HAMMER!



He keeps getting it right. Libbies pay attention, puh-lease!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


"Those voices don't speak for the rest of us."



Still missing you Reagan.


Dukes up, people!  We gots some bar fighin' to do!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Are You Naive and Ignorant Like Me?

Had an interesting convo on facebook this weekend with some younger folks, most in their 20's, about the mosque situation in New York. The basic consensus among some of the young folks was that we, as a country, should get over ourselves and put our "stereotyping" to rest and let the Muslims have their freedom of religion. Of course I disagreed, but to my credit, I didn't call anyone a douche or an asswipe, so there's that.

I would like to continue the conversation today. Here is the wall post that started it all:

Stop being naive... the muslims are people too and HAVE the right to build a mosque wherever they want!! We need to stop discriminating and treating people like they are less than us if they dont believe in the same thing.....pure ignorance!

Oh no, she di'int! Needless to say, the conversation got lively, with both sides of the issue weighing in.

After some vigorous oppositional debate of the original author's post, this comment was left: I just dont like stereotyping and I think we need to put our differences aside and realize when it comes down to it we are all just people...

Oh, sweet little lambkins. As if that will ever happen. I offered this (in part): ...have you read anything about the cordoba institute?

(i kept calling it the "institute" instead of "initiative"...douche!)


To which the response was: Good point, Patti. Here's some information about them, to get some of their perspective: http://www.cordobainitiative.org/?q=content%2Fabout-ci

WHAT?!

The research being done on this subject was coming directly from the Cordoba Initiative?! I almost spit on my computer screen from shock, and truthfully, I laughed a sad little laugh. Bad Patti.

When I responded that in order to get clear and truthful info about The Cordoba Initiative, you would need to get your info from places other than THE CORDOBA INITIATIVE (research 101), the leap was made that I got my info from FOX, CNN or MSNBC, none of which I have used in my research.

Most of these fine young Americans are college-educated, hard-working, upstanding citizens and perfectly delightful to spend time with, yet my fear is that they are too easily manipulated by political correctness (they hang tight to the idea of a "fair" life) when anyone squeals about their right's being trampled. It's like telling them war can be useful and watching them implode.

~KNEEJERK~ ALL WAR IS EVIL! SAVE THE WHALES! BLERGITY BLERGH!

Instead of doing the hard work of researching an important issue, instead of asking the hard questions that would lead them to the more important UNANSWERED questions, to face the truth of what they find whether they agree or disagree instead of going the dangerous route of can't-we-all-just-get-along (not this time, my pretties), my queasy feeling was that they knew very little about the actual facts and were offering the libbie MSM party-line as their own opinion.

Yet, I believe in our young folk, still. They give me a headache sometimes, but I know from experience the headiness of youth. Dismissing the wisdom of previous generations is an age-old rite of passage. As is the moment of realization that your parents were exceedingly more capable than you ever gave them credit for.

On the other hand, many my age dismiss our young and their libbie loving ways. I love the young, while debating their beliefs. I love the give and take and understand that one day most of them will come to appreciate the position of the generations before them. While I try not to be condescending of their viewpoints, I can't help but wonder if they actually believe the words coming out of their mouths. Tell me why you believe what you believe. To SAY you believe something is the easiest thing in the world to do. To bandwagon, even easier. To actually KNOW you believe something, and the WHY behind your belief, the passion, is something entirely different.

All we can do is wait for that moment, 'cause we're gonna need our young people if we're gonna take back our country that we love so deeply. The same country that still allows a public exchange of opposing views.

Even if you fall on the side of "naive" and "ignorant."

Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday Film Threesome!

You know the drill....

THE LIGHTS! GET THE LIGHTS!


Constitution Primer for our younger folks by Andrew Klavan:






Union Jackholes Jobs vs Children's Lives: Whose Side Are You On? (this one is a bit longer than I typically post, but well worth the time. one caveat: it will make your lip curl in disgust as you watch unions rationalize their position, which as we all now by now is the F-U position.)





HOLY BURNING CROSS, BATMAN! Hang on to your hoods hats, it's about to get u-g-l-y up in here, gurl.   Obama repeatedly called "N*gger" and "Coon" by black participants in 2009 rally organized by NAACP official.




Somewhere, David Duke is blushing.


Those last two left a dirty taste in my mouth.  Anyone have any of that magic gum that cleans things up?!

Wow.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Asswipe Edition

Asswipe Who Is NOT A Hero: Steven Slater.

Sorry, but when one has to deploy an airline emergency slide to escape a situation he was trained to control, nay, one he inflamed then ran away from, then that one asswipe is the opposite of a hero; that one is a laughing-stock coward. See? There's a clear difference.


Asswipe Who Thought He Was Clever, But Missed His Mark: Robert Gibbs

If anyone needs to be drug-tested it's the room full of MSM that "reports" (Oh, HAHAHAHAHA!) on the LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE! WH press conferences when the country is burning. Wait, now I'm talking about it. Fine. Pass the cup.


Asswipe Who Pooped Himself....Again: Al Gore

Gore whined to his supporters that "The United States government as a whole has failed us." FINALLY! A comment I can get behind. Whew. Too bad he meant that the governement failed to pass Cap and Trade for his monetary gain.

This on top of losing the presidency?! IT'S TOO MUCH!!!!!

Boohoohoo.....POOP!


Asswipe Who's A Race-Baiter: Harry Reid

When someone uses the words, "...their skin's a tone darker than ours..." you can be pretty confident they are race-baiting. RACIST! For a politician to do it in order to win the day, is contemptible.


Aswipe Who Got Caught In Newb Facebook Blunder: Keith Halloran (Democratic hopeful)

Keithy-Boy heard of the deadly Alaskan plane crash that killed Ted Stevens and couldn't pull up his facebook page fast enough and leave a status update on his wall that stated, " Just wish Sarah and Levy (sic) were on board."

Hey Keith, maybe you should check your privacy settings. YOUR POLITICAL I.Q. IS SHOWING and the numbers are low, oh so low!

Hey Sarah, keep punching them in the nuts! It's working!!!


Asswipe Who Got BUSTED Trying To Pass Himself Off As A Racist Tea Party Member: Um, my name is Tyler





Pull on your boot, people. It's getting dirty out there. 82 more days, and we've got this.

Onward.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

So Many Stories, So Little Space

WIN! Jihad Work Accident: Pakistani Taliban Fighter Killed When Landmine Being Planted Explodes Prematurely (that's what she said!)




Douche of the Day: Joe Donelly

Joe Donelly, a Washington two-term Dem, wants you to believe that he works for you, that he's not part of that "Washington crowd." Problem is Joe voted WITH Barry on healthcare. Doesn't get more "Washington crowd" than that, does it?



Dems will stop at nothing to get elected, even eat their own, or at the very least pretend to. Winkity wink. Too bad for them, we ain't buying the turds they have for sale.




Filed under Everyone's a Comic: House Republicans Suggest Names For Democrats' Untitled, 26 BILLION "Second Stimulus" Bill

My fav: "Frivolous Act of Ineffective Largesse (FAIL) Act"

Lord help us.


And finally, A German WIN! Germany does what America Should Do

Law lays the smackdown with this opening POW! BAM! WACK!: "Two countries face terrorist threats. One does something about it, the other dithers. Germany recently shut down a mosque in Hamburg that spawned at least one of the 9-11 bombers. At the same time, the American left and the Kumbaya artists use flawed logic, poor Constitutional law, and Orwellian thinking to justify support for a mega-mosque just a few steps away from the spot where the 9-11 murderers carried out their plans."

Who knew we'd one day see Germany solidly kicking ass and wish it was us?



83 more days.
Stay strong, mah babies.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Time For The Dems To Activate Their Emergency Slides

Made Me LOL of the Day: Flight Attendant Uses Emergency Slide To Escape Dispute

Cliff Notes: after landing, but not quite ready for folks to get out of their seats, an attendant instructs a passenger to sit down, passenger refuses while cursing the attendant and continues to retrieve his luggage that hits said attendant in the head, who then stomps (my impression) over to the p.a..system and curses everyone out right before he activates the emergency slide and makes a grand exit, after which he ran away. 

DRAMAZ QUEEN!

I see you wondering what this has to do with politics, but seriously, isn't this what the Libbies do on a daily basis?  (i'm stretching the analogy a tad, but stay with me) They tell us what to do, we curse them while refusing, they go to the MSM to curse the entire nation out, then activate their emergency slide in order to run away.

In other news that might make the attendant curse and activate the emergency slide: First Lady Took Spain Vacation With a "Dear Friend"  Whose Father Recently Died.

Uh-huh.

"...she made the trip because she promised one of her closest friends, a longtime Chicago pal who just lost her father, she would spend time with her."

Show of hands, who believes this bullshit?  ~scanning enormous Wonk crowd~   Exactly as I suspected.  No one!  Fine, The Troll does, but other than that...no one!

To put it bluntly ( I KNOW!  you sweet lambs aren't used to such things here!): I don't give a crap who died.  I don't give a fly F about arrogant promises kept.  There is no reason to spend 75K of taxpayer money during a time when many of those who actually voted for this hot mess in the W.H. (man, i bet y'all feel duped) are unemployed and suffering. 

But hey, the important thing is keeping a promise (this may be the first one kept by this administration, and that it also comes at American's detriment is no surprise).   I bet they pinkie swore and everything. 

Barry and Crew aren't stupid.  What they do on a daily basis has intent.  They have closed their ears to the American people and their will.  It matters not to them.  Not one red cent.  Remember that.

Remember that, take your anger to the polls in November and let's see how many emergency slides get activated as the libs are forced to run away.

Monday, August 9, 2010

The Land of Milk and Babies

Good Morning, dear readers.  There's no time to waste.  Helmets on.  DO IT!


Across Texas, 60,000 babies of non-citizens get U.S. birthright.

See?!  It's that easy to become a citizen.  Momma just needs to get her preggers behind into the country illegally, and VIOLA! a new citizen is born.  Literally.  Silly immigrants who go through years of legal channels in order to EARN their citizenship.  Too bad your mom wasn't as clever as the mammacitas in Texas.

There are an estimated 1.5 million illegals in Texas alone.  1.5 million people, who are knowingly and wantonly breaking the law on a daily basis.  They know that THEIR sweet innocent babies will be citizens if born on OUR soil.  And the Dems use that heart-string puller to manipulate the argument FOR amnesty.  It's a poor argument, but one that snookers many people.

Tiny babies.  So innocent.  How can you insist they return to their rightful countries?!  I counter that if we no longer offered free citizenship to the babies of illegal parents, that they'd most likely be born in their own country.  I counter that if our government closed this free-citizenship loophole, it'd be a great first step in showing the illegals our intent of securing our borders, i.e., NO MORE FREEBIES on the backs of honest Americans.

60,000 babies born last year in the state of Texas by illegal mommas.  Who wants to guess the number born, in Texas alone, from 2001-2009?  Ready?!  542,152 babies.  Staggering, isn't it?

State Rep. Rafael Anchia, D-Dallas is crying to anyone who will listen that the Republicans are big fat meanies as they use the birth numbers to "generate an explosive election issue."

Generate?  GENERATE?!  As if to say that the issue isn't already being discussed and debated the entire country over?  And why, State Rep. Anchia, do you think that folks in the state can hardly talk of anything else?!  Do you think it might have something to do with your constituents, and constituents ALL OVER THE COUNTRY, being fed up with liberalism and Washington's arrogant refusal to listen to the very people that elected them into office, on such a vital issue to our homeland security?!  Why is it that we get it and you don't, sir?

Rafael, you sir, are an Idiot Royale if you cannot grasp that good, hardworking folks are angry at those who are blatant takers, are angry at those who thumb their noses at our laws, but most importantly (you really should pay very close attention here, sir) are angry at our representatives who are NOT representing our views and are instead pushing an agenda that will bring a ruination to this country.

Rep. Anchia, if you truly believe that, "It's all about the November elections, and continuing to use the immigration issue as a wedge to win votes this fall." you are not intellectually fit for the office you occupy.  If you don't believe what you claim, yet merely refuse to state the truth about the matter, feel you must tow the party line, then that makes you a liar.  Either way, me thinks your days may be numbered.

We are educated.  We are angry.  We are organized.  We are energized.  We are on to you. 

Best of all?  We are gathering to take your jobs. 

See you dopes in November.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Wonk's Inaugural Joke...sadly it's on you (and me)

I get sent lots of jokes, but I'm really not a joke kinda gal. My funny bone is tickled by biting sarcasm and physical pratfalls. That being said, I give you Wonk's inaugural joke:

(hat tip: vickie!)

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.

Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.

Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she is finished the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars, so she writes him a check.

Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.

When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA so cheaply.

The devil smiles and replies: "Since Obama took over, the country has gone to hell, so it's a local call."

Padum-dum! ~rim shot~

It's funny cause it's based in truth. Witness:









See?! That we have gone to hell since Barry and Crew have been in office, makes the joke f-u-n-n-a-y!

Oy.


Thursday, August 5, 2010

Newsy News

News of the Hysterical: Yes, yes, the courts ( a judge in San Fransisco no less...oh the jokes i could make) ruled Prop 8 unconstitutional, blahblahblah...(or as Weasel Zippers correctly labeled it: judiciary tyranny)

Here's my hope and when Andrew comes over, he'll tell me if I'm on the mark or if I've lost my ever-living mind: this WILL go to the Supreme Court, where it will face less of an activism panel and be held up as law; a law the voters streamed to the polls and voted for. This isn't over by a long shot. So, just calm down everyone. (Law: I'm trying brother, but it ain't easy)



Surprising News That's Really Not: Feds ADMIT storing checkpoint body scan images

What?! The government outright lied to us?! Oh my, I feel the vapors coming on. Deny, Deny, Deny, turns into: fine, we lied, we're storing the images, but only for "testing, training and evaluation purposes."

Government Translation: We say one thing, but do the opposite. We are liars, thieves and hooligans, passing around your intimate images!

Can't believe anyone believed that they were originally telling the truth. As if.



News of the Dang-it: Iran's Ahmadinejad Survives Blast Near Motorcade

Double dog dagnabbit. Not like I go around clapping or cheering when anyone gets blown to smithereens, but I'd make an exception in this case. Hell, I'd bake a cake. But alas, the rat lives to see another day.



News of the Ignorant: George thinks the Mosque is groovy because "radical Islam" isn't at play in its construction.



Dude, your incompetence is showing. Seriously. Grow a pair, would ya?!



High-Five Worthy News: Mo. Voters Reject Key Provision of Health Care Law

Isn't it delicious that Missouri is the SHOW ME state?!

Um, Barry? They be showing you.



Prop 8 EDIT: LawHawk over at Commentarama discusses Prop 8 in lawyery detail today. Deep breathes, folks. We're not done yet.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Wednesday Wankers

Americans who swap passports.

What does it mean to swap passports?!  Is this a swingers kinda thang?  Is it for fun?  For a thrill?  WHAT?!

It's none of those things.  Americans who are swapping their passports are actually "hoping" to give up their citizenship, their AMERICAN CITIZENSHIP,  in order to outfox the federal goverment's tax burden, AKA the I.R.S.

Fools.

Allow me to offer them a proper sendoff:  Good riddance.  Don't let the door hit you in your ass.  GET OFF OUR LAWN!

It's beyond my comprehension that anyone born here would renounce their citizenship over money.  But, like I said, I'm not too torn up about these idiots getting out.  At least they can no longer vote.  WIN WIN for us! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


No Shit of the Day: ObamaCare Only Looks Worse Upon Further Review

Remember when Pelosi foreshadowed our fate with this little number: “We must pass the bill so you can find out what’s in it, away from the fog of controversy.”

Well, the bill has passed and Congressman Kevin Brady (TEXAS!) and U.S. Senator Sam Brownback (KANSAS!) took a detailed looksee.  What they found scares the sass right out of me.

"For Americans, as well as Congressional Democrats who didn’t bother to read the bill, this first look at the final health care law confirms what many fear, that reform morphed into a monstrosity of new bureaucracies, mandates, taxes and rationing that will drive up health care costs, hurt seniors and force our most intimate health care choices into the hands of Washington bureaucrats,"said Brady, the committee’s senior House Republican. "If this is what passes for health care reform in America, then God help us all."
Lord have mercy.  And you think that's the worst of it, right?  WRONGO!

They composed a monster flowchart that might be my Halloween costume this year.  Talk about frightening.  Please click over (scroll to the bottom of page and then click on the actual chart), if you have the stomach for it, and LOOK at that mofo.

I couldn't take my eyes off of it.

But as big as the rendering is, Brady admits committee analysts could not fit the entire health care bill on one chart. "This portrays only about one-third of the complexity of the final bill. It’s actually worse than this."

Lord, help us.


I will not say I told anyone so, but I will keep hollering/yodeling/rapping that we must REPEAL AND REPLACE.  Join me, won't you?  After all, who doesn't love an interactive blog?!

Also, because I'm all about offering solutions, well, not really, I'm more about shaking an old man fist in the direction of Washington and spitting, but I know folks who are offering solutions, slip on over to CommentaramaThey made a very good case for REPEAL AND REPLACE.  Go take a look and see if this isn't more common sense than coming from 85% of Washington.

Wait.  Is that percentage way too generous?

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Every now and then I offer something that has nothing to do with politics, something that makes me laugh.  Who needs a laugh?  You DO?!  What'd ya know, me too!

Enjoy, mah babies.

First there was this legit news story:


And then there was the REMIX!


♫ so dumb, so dumb, SO DUMB! ♫

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Lady Gaga = FAIL

I was told yesterday not to be HYSTERICAL by LawHawk over at Commentarama at the thought of what Barry may or may not do about his stay (after 2012) in office.  So, because Law asked nicely and I really respect what he has seen in his life, I will agree to calm my ass down for now.  But it makes one (me) wonder what his all-high-and-mighty, I.E. the-man-who-would-be-supreme-ruler, Barry, will do to stay in office, sans coup (oh come on, you know I'm totally thinking coup, but under strict orders from Law, I WILL NOT get HYSTERICAL...yet).

Whew.

Now, where does that leave us?


Lady Gaga went and ruined her music for me, by yapping about Arizona and the immigration law: "I think it's important that people understand that it's a state of emergency for this place and this state." (note: her interpretation of "a state of emergency" and the common folks interpretation are MILES apart.  while she denounces the law, BAD BAD LAW!, she doesn't say anything specific that she doesn't like about it.  clever, eh?!  well, that or she is ignorant of what she rails against.  or just plain stoopid.  me thinks it's the latter.  possibly the cocaine talking.  it's hip to be on the illegal side of the law, common sense/knowledge of the issue/a brain be damned.)

DAMN IT!  Why must entertainers ruin it for me?

I have only one thing to say to the Hollywood/Music court jesters (hat tip: The Rock): KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH.

You serve to entertain me.  Period.  Momma does not need a lecture from a 24 year old, cocaine-addled, idiot who has no idea of what she speaks.  You can bet, her bottom line is the bottom line: I SUPPORT ILLEGALS = hoped for boost in sales.  Gosh, at first glance that seems so, so, manipulative.

Yet for me, Lady Gaga shooting off her mouth in such a absolute way means I must withdraw my coin for her talent.  If she's for illegals, if she's protesting WITH the lawbreakers, then she's against my man Joe and making his job harder.  And you know how I feel about Joe

Ozzy Osborn has it right.  That's right, Ozzy, in his drug-ravaged body and mind, powns Gaga.  When asked if his latest album is political he had this to say: "I'm not the Bono of metal. If you're an entertainer, be an entertainer. If you want to be a politician, join the rest of the [bleeps]."

Ozzy to Gaga: DOWN PUPPY!

There's a jester who knows his role.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Snap Out Of It!

So, it's finally Monday and after the unending news/giddiness/blabbage of the "Royal Wedding" between Chelsea and her fiance (what did she wear?  bill lost 20 pounds!  hillary was named after sir edmund hillary!!  oh wait...), I am in the mood to interject some reality into so much fantasy.

Royal wedding, indeed.  My guess is that loyal subjects do not point and laugh at their royalty as much as we at "ours" (the horror at the thought of the clintons being "our" royalty).  May I present, His Royal Highness I-did-not-have-sex-with-THAT-woman...

Back to reality, libbies...

I don't know if you have heard, but Sheriff Joe Arpaio's cajones are the biggest in the land, possibly the world!  I'm talking World's Largest Things Roadside Tour in America big.  And, as it is when you have the biggest anything, people want what you have.  Operative "people" being the Mexican Cartel.

Mexican Drug Cartel Allegedly Puts a Price on Arizona's Sheriff's Head

One million dollars for his head and one thousand to anyone offering to join the cartel.  Hold on now, does that count as employment if you join?  And is this then part of Barry's Stimulus Package (stimulus package...hehe)?  Is he trying to bring down the unemployment numbers, one new cartel member at a time?!

All I know is if the Mexican Cartel is offering money for my man Joe's head, Joe's doing it right and every American who is concerned about their homeland should be backing the good sheriff up, if by nothing more than prayer.  The Mexican Cartel is a ruthless group.  Ruthless as in when they decapitated the police chief of a northern Mexican town, they left his head in his lap.

These are the guys that are allegedly pining for Joe's head.

The libbies act like the illegals in this country just want a fair shake; they use the old pull-on-your-heartless-heart-strings method to convince you that you're wrong about illegals.  Joe, and many others see it differently.  If you will break such a fundamental law by coming in the back door illegally, try to remain hidden in plain sight, refuse to follow a path for legal entry into our country, complain that American citizens are uncaring and unfeeling, feel the need to rise up in protest, then you become a threat.  Illegals are a threat.

And it's our fault, really.  We haven't fought illegal immigration as staunchly as we should have throughout the years.  We mostly turned a somewhat closed eye to the matter.  And look where it's gotten us.  The Mexican Cartel wants one of our own for a trophy.

Lord help them if the succeed.

Joe, you make me proud.  So few are willing to take the risk you are taking.  So few are willing to stand and be the face of strength and honor.  So few are willing to face evil and refuse to back down.  Well done, patriot.

As for my part, I will pray daily for your safety.  I will pray daily for the safety for this land.  And I will ask others to do the same.  Please join me in my efforts, dear readers.

And Joe?  Thanks, brother.  Job well done.

God Speed to all who fight the good fight, and may God Bless America.